Burnout is Real. Now What?

Burnout is Real, Now What?
In the first blog “What is Burnout?” I defined burnout as; over utilization of personal resources without replenishment. I use this definition because it seems to bring together what is found in various piles of research. Burnout can creep up on anyone in many different situation. Burnout is real, now what?

This blog is rather long. The hardest part about writing this blog was choosing what was going to stay when I started making edits. I had to remember that this isn’t a stress management workshop and not everything could be here, I was focused specifically on burnout. Here are some of the ways to avoid burnout and fight the symptoms that may appear.

Ways to Avoid Burnout

• It’s ok to say NO.
  • Easier said than done, I know, but saying no can reduce the load and take things off your shoulders that may have been causing worry or unnecessary stress. This isn’t necessarily saying no to your boss in a cinematic, slow motion, triumphant, fist in the air fashion but rather taking a moment to evaluate your situation and communicate why taking on something more (at that moment) may not be advantageous for yourself or others. Perhaps a response of “that sounds like a great project, I would like you to keep me posted, but currently I am wrapping up some things and I would like to focus my energy on those projects. Can we revisit this in a couple of weeks?”  My daughter was saying YES to every request she had to help out at the theater. I asked her why she was spreading herself so thin. She said she didn’t want to miss anything or people to be mad at her. This is a real fear when we say no to something. However if we say yes to everything we may not have the energy or desire to really embrace and flourish in the opportunities we are given.
• Stop, look, breath, and stretch.  
  • Plan three times a day to stop, look, breathe, and stretch. If you start to get fidgety, frustrated, overwhelmed, or lose focus, stop what you are doing, place your hands on your knees and take a DEEP breath, exhale and look around.  Recognize where you are, what you are doing, and how you feel. Take another deep breath, stretch, and then exhale. This will clear your mind and get you back on track. This is also very helpful when you are trying to relax but work or other stressors start to invade your thoughts. It might be that you need take a short walk, switch up what you are doing, or jump right back in. Taking the time to stop, look, breath, and stretch will help you determine what you need to do to get back on track.
• Perfectionism doesn’t make perfect, it make procrastination.
  • Know what the number one symptom of perfectionism is? Procrastination! Often perfectionists start off big, and take charge only to fall into exhaustion in the end. Because of a fear of criticism and self-doubt the tweaking and reviewing of every detail never ends. Leaving the perfectionist with amazing pieces of work or half completed ideas sitting on their hard drive. PUT IT OUT THERE! This will be discussed further in another blog. I am a procrastinating perfectionist. I used to NEVER post blogs or other writings until they were reviewed numerous times and there are many things (including my book) that have never made it into public view because I wanted to add or change, just one more thing! This made tasks seem daunting and I struggled finishing or getting started on things. I had to make the leap and just put it out there!
• Got it TAKE IT.
  • When it is time for lunch, GO TO LUNCH. When it is time for vacation, TAKE VACATION. When it is time for a break, TAKE A BREAK. When it is time to go home, GO HOME. We often work through the times that we are given to get away. This is especially true when talking about caregiver (helping fields) burnout. I work with an individual who walks every day. I remember needing to ask her a question and she was on her way for 10 minute walk. She smiled at me and said “It can wait, my brain needs her break.” That has stuck with me for many years. Schedule downtime for yourself and stick to your plan. Even if it is just slipping out of the house to walk around the block or go have a cup of coffee, taking a scheduled break can help refresh your day.
• Be in the moment. Mindfulness
  •  This is really becoming a trendy thing to say, but few people understand the practice or the benefits. Sitting in Atlanta I overheard two people talking. I heard one of them say “No seriously, people will pay tons of money for the wishy washy crap. We should do a seminar.” Well needless to say, this was upsetting because mindfulness is a skill not a quick fix sold by charlatans.  I have been practicing mindfulness sense the day my daughter died and was brought back to life in front of my eyes. I had to find something on an almost daily basis that could bring me out of the trauma and into the now. I would look at my child and the only though I would have would be “Is she going to seize.” This was not a way to live. I was consumed by the possibility of something traumatic happening and missing the fun that was happening in that moment. Being in the moment then started to transfer into all aspects of my life. If I am working on a blog post, grading, or playing a board game I focus on the task at hand and I am mindful of the moment. Thinking about the deadline for my online course while writing my blog will only stifle my creativity and slow down my production.
• To do list = I did list
  • Tracking progress can be exciting but don’t let what you did just be replaced with more to do. If you have a list of ten items (especially if it is electronic) be sure not to just remove what you did. You can highlight it, underline, or move it to the other side. This way you can turn your to do list into an I did list that you can reflect upon. Also with to do lists, try to make them reasonable. If you put 100 items on your to do list with the hope that you will get them done by the end of the week, you have overwhelmed yourself at the start! Make smaller prioritized lists so you can see your accomplishments.
• Be kind to yourself, reframe that chatter!
  • I just wrote a post on Facebook asking for one of my English Teacher friends to edit my blog for me. I then thought to myself “It is good enough, I mean how many people are going to read it anyways.” BAD ME! That is not a kind thing to say to myself. Even if only one person sees this blog, and my husband better read it, it is important for me to do my best and produce something I am proud of.  We make comments to ourselves all the time that can slowly spiral us into feelings of isolation. When I hear people saying “I am just stupid” or “No one cares.” I want to run up to them and say LOUDLY “To what are you referring?” Then I want to help the REFRAME those statements. This also goes for the “should have” statements we make. We bombard ourselves with negative chatter and soon our thoughts and behaviors start to reflect our words. I am not saying just thinking positive will bring everything you want to your table but I am saying thinking negatively about yourself and what you should have done is an unproductive way to live. Speak truth without the loathing.
• Ask for help.
  • Having a support system of friends or associates can be paramount to avoiding burnout. This goes for any type of profession. Asking for help can be hard and many people avoid asking for help because they don’t want to look weak or incompetent. I combat this fear with making sure the people I ask for help would never think those things in the first place.
• Avoid catching the negative bug.
  • That’s right negativity is contagious, it has been researched. Of course it is good to acknowledge that a little venting in a safe environment is good but often our coworkers don’t want to (or need to) hear what is on our minds. When negativity comes around it seeps into our skin and influences us to participate. When negativity comes your way, by means of a coworker or teenager, smile and be respectful but don’t let it drag you under. One way to avoid catching the negativity is to say, “It sounds like you are having a rough day, I hope it gets better.” Then get moving. Walk to the coffee pot, kitchen, or down the hall for some water. Eventually the person who has the negative flu will stop coming around because they aren’t getting reinforced.
• Laugh.
  • I am leaving you with my favorite technique to avoid burnout. That’s right, laugh. Simply put, chuckle, snicker, giggle, chortle, cackle, snort, however it is you laugh, DO IT! There is a whole training you can get in Laugh Yoga. I don’t think we need to be trained but we do need to get started! Laughter has TONS of benefits and it can turn a moment around. Our bodies even have a mechanism to prompt laughter when under extreme stress. Stop right now and just laugh or smile BIG. It just makes things better.
• Toss the guilt.
  • Specifically, I wanted to address a subject that is dear to my heart. Caregiver guilt. Often we feel guilty about hard decision we have had to make, or taking time to care for ourselves. Guilt is a fast track to burnout. False guilt involves self-doubt and questioning of one’s self-efficacy, locus of control and motives. If you start to feel guilty because you can’t get everything right find someone to talk to. Perhaps a friend, coworker, or professional (who will listen). We are allowed to thrive and be happy. Just because we live and deal with situations others may find heartbreaking doesn’t mean we can’t also have happiness in our lives. You have to fill your own cup with happiness, strength, and love so you can let the spill over into others’ lives.  

Next week: I received an e-mail asking me “Why do you think you can teach people to manage stress?” This is a valid question, perhaps for the next blog.

Thanks for reading this three part series on burnout. I hope it has given you some insight and strength! 


Meredith Brown